Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Everybody wants to be a thug


Being an artist is not easy. The creativity the public sees takes time to develop, practice to perfect, and tenacity not to give up. The same rules apply to making a living as an artist. It has been said that the artist's financial career takes just as much creativity to manage as it does to actually create the art. I find this to be true.

I work as a substitute teacher on occasion to earn money when other fiscal opportunities are not rampant. Today I had an experience that I felt worth blogging about. It started yesterday. I was in a 6th grade class with another teacher - their regular teacher - when she was having an extremely difficult time getting her students on task. So much that she took away their recess for the following day and told the Dean of the School that their class needs to have a "serious talk" with the Dean and herself. I was asked to wait in the back of the room until the second half of the lesson to assist the students but this teacher was struggling so hard that I decided to intervene earlier than instructed to. As I approached students they generally got quiet and heeded to my pleas for no talking and attention on their teacher, although I had to say it more than once. However, one particular student decided not listen at all and was simply dismissive of me. I repeatedly asked him to get on task, they were supposed to be taking a quiz, but he would ignore me or just flat out say no he won't get on task, repeating "you're just a sub" as he would backtalk me. I've experienced this before. It wasn't a big deal...it didn't have to be. Before I stooped to his level and argued with a 6th grader, I walked away, shook my head, and uttered under my breath, "Everybody wants to be a thug". This triggered something in him.

I returned to this school today with a fresh attitude and was greeted warmly by the staff and students. During one of my breaks the Dean asked to speak with me. In her office was none other than the "you're just a sub" boy from the day before. She asked me what happened in class for me to call him a thug. Aghast, I had to jog my memory to even remember what she was talking about. When it came to me I explained to her the situation and let her know that I said, "everybody wants to be a thug", when my back was to him as I walked away from his provocations. She let me know he told his mother about I called him a thug. And his mother wasn't happy about that. I apologized to him and told him I didn't mean to offend him. I meant it. He didn't accept my apology. The Dean said she will talk with him later about that and thanked me for apologizing. She followed by saying I shouldn't call a student a "thug" and he shouldn't be disrespectful to adults. She'll call his mother to let her know we met and everything should be fine. Later this day the very same Dean approaches me and tells me she won't be needing my services anymore, and then starts to walk away. I had to stop her to ask her why. She told me that the word "thug" was inappropriate to call a student and not something one should ever hear coming from an adult's mouth in their school building. She said it's negative and disrespectful and no student should feel like they are being disrespected by anybody there, especially a teacher. Point taken. But didn't we already resolve this?


From my understanding the word "thug" does have a negative connotation and it is not something you should say to just anyone. I also think the word "thug" is associated with insecure people who try to feel powerful by bullying someone around. I feel like this kid bullied me. He challenged an adult in the school building and then used his "kid" status to bully his mother and Dean into believing I had ill intentions by using my words against me. His mother then used her parent status to backup his bullying. The Dean had to bully someone because she was getting jumped. and I was the last person in the equation. To recap, I was provoked into my slip of the tongue (the kid admits this too) and I apologized on my own accord for any offense. In our conference with the Dean, the kid, and myself he wasn't interested in my side of the story or my remorse. The Dean also said that this particular student had a "rough year" and has been influenced by what he hears and sees on the street. But to his credit he is making a better effort and getting back on track. I am happy for the kid. I wish him the best. I wish all kids the best. I thought the Dean saw this when she sat in my next class and witnessed the rapport I had with her other students. Apparently she didn't. Or apparently mother didn't. Either way, I was "fired" from that school. The Dean asked me to leave and called the organization that contracted me out to tell them not to send me there anymore. Damn, who's the thug in all of this?

My contractor was pretty understanding about the incident and just told me to be careful moving forward. I still got paid for the day and keep a working relationship with them. Plus, this incident is somewhat juxtaposed to a good review I received earlier this week for recent work I did with kindergarten children. It is what it is. The point of this story is do be mindful of what you say. You never know how someone will interpret it or use it against you. But if you are going to say something that could be misconstrued or misrepresented, make sure the people you saying it to hear you. It'll be worth in the end. If they can ever adversely affect you because of the words you speak, at least they'll know how you really feel. That's how thugs do it.

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